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AllBestWeekMonthRandom<Prev1..45678910..313Next> |
#305757* (?/56) ⚐Flag
<carnage> i just got like 100 bucks
<carnage> what do i buy
<Spin> porn
<SAGE> booze
<SaxxonPike> a gallon of gas |
#307094* (?/42) ⚐Flag
<robinetd> Seveas: I'm telling on my mommy to you.
<Seveas> robinetd, too bad IdleOne doesn't allow me to make 'yo momma' jokes anymore
<robinetd> Seveas: He's not an op here.
<Seveas> but he is dangerous
<IdleOne> Seveas: make all the jokes you like but when I am forced to complain about you (which I don't want to do because I luv you mucho) it's gonna suck.
<Seveas> IdleOne, like your mom. |
#308114* (?/42) ⚐Flag
<eshock> man
<eshock> the entire geocities archive is only 1tb
<jeffhorton> 500gb of it is between blink tags
* eshock zingComment: Freenode #gameai
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#311582* (?/31) ⚐Flag
@KittyKatt | I'll describe the weather to you in the form of a haiku.
@KittyKatt | There are birds chirping
@KittyKatt | But my heater is broken
@KittyKatt | I am fucking cold |
#311495* (?/28) ⚐Flag
(after freenode accidentally K-lined most of the network)
<kline> no users, no spam, right? |
#310328* (?/28) ⚐Flag
< DeadDodo> have you ever tried the "open the nearest book to page 45, the first sentence describes your lovelife"?
< DeadDodo> "The data file contains statistical information about the individual tests in a form that can easily be imported into a spreadsheet application."
< DeadDodo> Shtong: pretty much describes my sex life yes,
< Shtong> do you have statistical spreadsheets of your sex life ?
<@Belsameth> Takes him 2 seconds to make one
<@Belsameth> Open Excel
<@simoroth> and paste in 20 images of boy george.Comment: #maiagame on Quakenet
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#309968* (?/28) ⚐Flag
dglambert: Any senior developers around?
Arild: define "senior"
dglambert: I am just trying to get a poll on how many years it took to become a senior dev
Arild: not sure how such a poll matters; each company has a different definition of what "senior" means
dglambert: yeah I am just looking for a more average definition
Lemony: dglambert, its subjective
dglambert: I am about to start my first dev job, how quickly can I become a senior dev, at any company
Lemony: are you smart?
dglambert: yes
Lemony: are you motivated?
dglambert: yes
Lemony: then it could still take you 10 years, your question sucks, sorry. |
#310332* (?/37) ⚐Flag
"Rushnett": That should be a valentine card to be honest. "You're the only person I'd give root to" |
#305829* (?/46) ⚐Flag
<&AlliedEnvy> Mm, I dunno. I'm pissed at these libraries. They won't let me search in the way I want. If I just had access to their database, I'm sure I could format an SQL query to get what I want.
<@scythe> I've had the same problem with the NSA for several years. :/Comment: superhacker
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#310491* (?/24) ⚐Flag
<Phase4> what if you buttered both sides of the toast?
<Sanchal> You don't get quite as much torque as strapping the toast to the cat.
<Sanchal> You'd get even more torque if you could somehow find a way to get two cats to stay back to back long enough to secure them together without losing an arm in the process of failing.
<Phase4> why not more toast to the same cat?
<Phase4> surely that would increase torque without requiring additional cats
<Sanchal> That could work, though eventually you'd need more cat to make use of the toast.
<Sanchal> Otherwise the toast would eventually overpower the cat and bring the whole thing to a halt.
<Phase4> ah
<Phase4> man, energy would be a very different industry if that worked
<Phase4> and you'd have vegan power providers for people who aren't comfortable with the use of cats for power generation
<Phase4> that is a question, would cats survive the process? if not do deceased cats still produce the effect?
<Sanchal> Now you're asking the real questions.
<Sanchal> And if the process isn't fatal, how would we stop the production of power to let them eat and such?
<Phase4> perhaps you could just attach two pieces of toast together
<Phase4> lower torque but with enough strenthening it could run indefinitely
* Phase4 goes off to butter toast
<Sanchal> I guess it would just take up more space for the same amount of power.
<Phase4> and since it's vegan you could sell it for a premium
<Sanchal> Being easy as it is, it wouldn't be difficult to just stack units on top of each other in large towers.
<Phase4> unless... butter would be an issue, vegitarian power i guess
<Sanchal> We could finally fuel an electric powered rocket to leave the solar system.
<Phase4> i doubt canola spreads work
<Sanchal> I guess, if you really wanted to, you could probably make butter from human milk.
<Sanchal> Would that count as vegan?
<Phase4> with pure buttered toast you could miniaturize it
<Phase4> nano-toast reactors
<Sanchal> Spend a little time and some of the infinite energy to calculate the most efficient way to pack as many toast turbines into a set volume as possible.
<Phase4> this is very silly
<Sanchal> But we're having such a serious conversation about it. |
#306524* (?/32) ⚐Flag
<monsterinc> wish we could DOS' him
<@MorganNY> we did
<@MorganNY> we denied him our services |
#310115* (?/32) ⚐Flag
* CaptainAhab has joined #STALKER
<CaptainAhab> goodbye fellow stalkers
<CaptainAhab> cya in 12 months
<Spartan> umm...?
<CaptainAhab> going to leave to work on a ship
<Spartan> yours is truly Greek tragedy
<CaptainAhab> adios!
* CaptainAhab has left #STALKER
<Anna> work on a ship? dafuq
<Aardonyx> well he is a captain
<Anna> oh
<Anna> good point |
#309964* (?/32) ⚐Flag
<BigCrunch> Its obvious that o11c and ComfyCheeks are in a hotel room together trolling us all, naked surrounded by empty bottles of maple syrup, mountain dew and vhs tapes of hackers
<o11c> I would NOT be seen with a VHS |
#300015* (?/32) ⚐Flag
<AneiDoru> apoc
<AneiDoru> you live in Egypt?
<Apocalypse> yes AneiDoru i do
<AneiDoru> how is it like there?
<AneiDoru> lots of sand?
<Apocalypse> lmao
<Apocalypse> i always get that
<Ichiruka> Do you ride a camel?
<Apocalypse> yeah im actually on a camel in the desert with a big ass wifi tower behind me and a 1980 laptop -_-
<Apocalypse> its a city lol , a normal city
<Apocalypse> or a car y'know
<Apocalypse> we have those >.>
<Ailieron> So its a camel powered car?
<Apocalypse> [image of Cairo]
<Apocalypse> i live there anei
<AneiDoru> nice
<AneiDoru> it looks like portland, only with sand in the background
<Fax> such is the modern age!
<Fax> Where every place looks EXACTLY THE SAME
<Fax> with the possible exception of Venice
<Fax> but that's just because you're building houses on top of THE FREAKING OCEAN
<Fafnir> technically, it's just the sea
<Fax> Technically you're still BUILDING HOMES ON TOP OF A NONSOLID
<Fax> THE MIND
<Fax> IT BOGGLES
<Fax> WHATS NEXT
<Fax> BUILDING HOMES ON TOP OF A GEL?
<Fax> WELCOME TO JELLONIA
<Fax> LAND OF WE BUILD THINGS ON TOP OF JELLOComment: irc.vision-irc.net #bvs-colbertnation
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#304112* (?/76) ⚐Flag
< mode14> ok who wants to do my homework?
< mode14> going once
< shortcircuit> mode14: Nobody wants to do your homework.
< shortcircuit> mode14: That's the first rule of online programming help environments.
< orbitz> is your homework a hot guy?
< shortcircuit> (And that's rule 34) |
#306831* (?/41) ⚐Flag
< christopher> SO THE OBSERVABLE UNIVERSE BEHAVES IN A WAY THAT IMPLIES MORE MATTER EXIST THAN WHAT ONE CAN OBSERVE
< Repiphany> It is not necessary to talk in all caps, it makes me not want to talk back
< christopher> ITS A TESTOSTERONE THING I APOLOGIZE |
#306452* (?/18) ⚐Flag
* DJ_Lor is so not awake, and tired of these power outages.
<Gina> Power outages?
<Gina> We have not gotten any of these.
<DJ_Lor> We've had two in the last three days.
<DJ_Lor> Well, no.
<DJ_Lor> We had two instances where the power cuts out for just long enough make things STAY off.
<Gina> Wow, we haven't.
<DJ_Lor> The funny thing? I'd let THAT dissuade you from moving here. Not the shooting we had last week, though.
<Megz> no power for pc/internet > being shot in the face
<DJ_Lor> Shootings are much more rare than power outages, too. |
#303093* (?/18) ⚐Flag
* goekesmi finds coffee.
* goekesmi consumes coffee.
<SatNiGHTS> goekesmi gains 12 MP and 3 EXP
<thebug> also triples his movement for the next 5 rounds
<muchomas> goekesmi's charisma increases by 7
<goekesmi> I think muchomas probably got the closest to reality.
<Stormgren> goekesmi's accuracy decreases by -5 due to jitters for the next 5 rounds
<muchomas> apparently we're playing live-action GURPS sysadmin today |
#309057* (?/19) ⚐Flag
<Stoy> I can't fucking stop watching that cyberpunk trailer.
<Torio> You too stoy? That trailer is addictive xD
<Stoy> Torio, it's fucking gorgeous.
<Stoy> As a 3D artist I'm jelly.
<Stoy> I don't even care about the game.
<Torio> I slobbered when I saw her eyes and lips
<Torio> Then I came when I saw her boobs.
<Stoy> Uh. OKay.
<Stoy> We're enjoying completely different things about this trailer. |
#309375* (?/67) ⚐Flag
<TuxRug> You ever have those moments when you lay down in bed when it's really quiet right after running up the stairs, and you can feel your pulse in your neck and leg, and you can HEAR it too?
<@Unidentified20XD6> Yes.
<@Unidentified20XD6> You ever wake up at night, unable to move? Completely stiff, any attempts you make at even the simplest movements denied?
<@Unidentified20XD6> And then you hear something.
<@Unidentified20XD6> Out of the corner of your eye, you see a large dark shape.
<@Unidentified20XD6> Almost ectoplasmic.
<@Unidentified20XD6> And you try to shout, to scream. And realize there's a pressure on your chest.
<@Unidentified20XD6> Slowly compressing your lungs, making it impossible for you to get the air required to make even a peep.
<@Unidentified20XD6> All the while, that large dark shape is getting closer, giggling.
<@Unidentified20XD6> And it's at that point your heart begins to jackrabbit in your chest.
<@Unidentified20XD6> Faster and faster it beats.
<@Unidentified20XD6> Until it's reached a steady hum, all four chambers working in harmony like a four-stroke engine.
<@Unidentified20XD6> And you know your heart's about to explode.
<@Unidentified20XD6> There's no way anything biological can function at that speed. You can picture your heart shredding at the valves and atrium.
<@Unidentified20XD6> All the while, the giggling ectoplasm is getting closer.
<@Unidentified20XD6> And you know that if it touches you, it'll engulf you and you'll go mad.
<@Unidentified20XD6> It's wrong, somehow. It shouldn't exist.
<@Unidentified20XD6> Yet there it is, mere inches from your feet.
<@Unidentified20XD6> And all the while, getting closer.
<@Unidentified20XD6> It's grinning, the shape.
<@Unidentified20XD6> There's no visible face, of course.
<@Unidentified20XD6> But it's happy all the same.
<@Unidentified20XD6> You can sense its unadulterated glee. But it's corrupt.
<@Unidentified20XD6> The humor it feels is sadistic. It enjoys seeing you pinned, at your weakest.
<@Unidentified20XD6> Unable to move, pure terror coursing through your veins.
<@Unidentified20XD6> Your heart feels close to bursting when you can feel your limbs start to vibrate.
<@Unidentified20XD6> The blood being forced through your capillaries is causing them to stretch and distort.
<@Unidentified20XD6> Even the smallest cut at this point would simply gout.
<@Unidentified20XD6> Splattering your ichor on the walls.
<@Unidentified20XD6> All this over the course of seconds.
<@Unidentified20XD6> And then it's over.
<@Unidentified20XD6> You're free.
<@Unidentified20XD6> Physically, at least. Mentally, you'll relive that scene.
<@Unidentified20XD6> Over.
<@Unidentified20XD6> And over.
<@Unidentified20XD6> And over.
<@Unidentified20XD6> Just me, then? |
#305239* (?/69) ⚐Flag
<steelemix> one of my friends changed like half the numbers in my cellphone to 911
<steelemix> so i tried to call my mom and i ended up calling the cops instead |
#310156* (?/54) ⚐Flag
<+osuka_> Lunatrius: you code shit
<+osuka_> how do I fix a bug I can't reproduce?
<@Lunatrius> You promote it to a feature
<+osuka_> this was probably the single best answer I've ever seenComment: bad made funny
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#304069* (?/58) ⚐Flag
Matt: I am so silly
Matt: my stomach has been hurting for the past hour or so
Matt: and it _just now_ occurred to me that I should eat something.
Danny: ...
Danny: if you were living on a desert island
Danny: made of chocolate
Danny: you would probably starve
Matt: yeah
Matt: I'd be too busy trying to make a computer :P
Danny: OUT OF CHOCOLATE
Matt: I've got 300 mega-bars of storage! :D
Danny: ...
Danny: I'm disowning you
Danny: for like the fifth time
Matt: and 128 kilo-chips of RAM |
#308817* (?/8) ⚐Flag
<Itachi> i can dream, cant I
<Keevan> i have a dream
<Itachi> about?
<Keevan> that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character
<Itachi> damnit Keevan! makin me all teary-eyed and shit
<Drenzieg> well this sucks becuase the content of my character is really shitty...
<Keevan> I win |
#301931* (?/75) ⚐Flag
<k0n> I am so fucking pissed off
<k0n> about a week ago gf asked me to jailbreak the iPhone I bought her
<k0n> so I did, and told her not to upgrade to the new software version cos it breaks things
<k0n> anyway this morning she phones me up bitching at me because the jailbreak doesn't work
<k0n> guess what - she's updated the software.
<mimmic> haha, moron
<k0n> so I went over there to go see if I could re-jailbreak it, and she pretty much refused to talk to me and spent the whole time giving me evil eyes
<k0n> like it's MY fault
<k0n> I spent a good hour researching and basically the result is that the new version can't be jailbroken yet
<k0n> so she THROWS THE FUCKING IPHONE AT THE WALL. O_O
<mimmic> wtf?!
<k0n> then has a massive rant at me about how I never do anything for her
<mimmic> dump the bitch
<k0n> nah, I have a plan for revenge
<k0n> nekkid holiday pictures, meet 4chan |