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#302507* (?/16) ⚐Flag
Megatron> one girl I know got on web cam and started masturbating out of the blue and I was like ummm okay
<Megatron> and she went and got a tray of ice cubes and put 3 of them in her but before she started spasming uncontrollably.
<ninjalulu> i assure you, wasnt me.Comment: #machall on irc.sorcery.net
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#311134* (?/17) ⚐Flag
<hpl> I bought a new broom
<hpl> cleaning became a breeze when it doesn't fall apart every 10 seconds
<graspee> BROOM!
<graspee> i hope your old broom died in battle
<graspee> for only then can it enter: BRISTLEGARD! |
#307673* (?/79) ⚐Flag
<cky> "Nothing is better than sex. Masturbation is better than nothing. Therefore, masturbation is better than sex."
<jmkeyes> ohhh logical fallacies
<cky> jmkeyes: Indeed!!
<cky> The fallacy here being that "nothing" is not a single point, but is a massive space.
<cky> And that the two "nothings" above refer to different points in that space.
<KirarinSnow> cky: the fallacy is that 'nothing' is not of the same semantic type as any particular thing
<KirarinSnow> though it appears to be syntactically the same
<KirarinSnow> a particular thing is of type e
<KirarinSnow> 'nothing' is of type <<e, t>, t>
<KirarinSnow> in other words, to evaluate a sentence "the cake is a lie", where "the cake" is an expression of type e denoting an object
<KirarinSnow> and "is a lie" is an expression of type <e, t> (that is, a predicate mapping objects of type e to truth values)
<KirarinSnow> we apply the function denoted by "is a lie", which is λx.[x is a lie]
<KirarinSnow> to the individual denoted by "the cake"
<KirarinSnow> and we get a truth value
<KirarinSnow> with 'nothing', on the other hand, you have the sentence "nothing is a lie"
<KirarinSnow> you can't apply the same function because 'nothing' is not an expression of type e
<KirarinSnow> instead, you apply the function denoted by 'nothing' to the predicate instead
<KirarinSnow> 'nothing' denotes \lambda P. \lambda x.~P(x)
<KirarinSnow> when you apply this lambda to the function denoted by "is a lie"
<KirarinSnow> you get by beta reduction
<KirarinSnow> \forall x.~[(\lambda y.[y is a lie])(x)]
<KirarinSnow> another round of beta reduction gives you
<KirarinSnow> \forall x.~[x is a lie]
<KirarinSnow> this is how quantifiers work in semantics (on the basic level)
<KirarinSnow> linguists love lambdas
<Daeken> wow
<Daeken> it's rare that 30 lines here will go completely over my head. you pulled it off. |
#305826* (?/52) ⚐Flag
CWalker: On a related note, my class is getting pizza in english tomorrow
CWalker: As a celebration of the completion of our folios
Beardface: Man, I am tired, I thought you said completion of our felatios
Beardface: The pizza would've been there for the bitter aftertaste I imagine
Beardface: well I guess it's more salty then bitter
Beardface: but I digress
CWalker: You *guess*?
CWalker: Do tell more
Beardface: I would tell a story right now, but I'd embaress myself ON THE INTERNET
CWalker: And that would be truly horrific
Beardface: Fuck eeeet, so a while ago I may have been experimented with self felattio. After many tries, I finally succedeed. In this moment of glory, I got past the point of no return, and in order to avoid stickyfying my entire face, I...
Beardface: well, you can probably guess
CWalker: I can't
CWalker: Continue
Beardface: Well, I had to...swallow, since my bathroom is across from my parent's room, and me going through with my mouth filled with liquid and my pants to my knees would've been hawkward. Of course I didn't realise that this was happening at night.
Beardface: so I could've gone away with it.
Beardface: But eh. |
#303998* (?/52) ⚐Flag
<Arlight> Last night was occupied, for me and a couple friends, with playing Diablo II over LAN - every time one of us used a town portal, we all had to drink (had a couple tallboys each of Steel Reserve). Was a good time.
<Jeff|Laptop> dude, you turned diablo 2 into a drinking game!
<Jeff|Laptop> i gotta dig out my discs and install again
<Arlight> Fuck yeah we did.
<Arlight> Halfway through, we added in an 'everyone drinks when someone levels' clause, too.
<Arlight> We had a barbarian named "HUR_DUR", a sorceress named "Tipper", and a warwilf by the name of "Doggles_Micgee".
<Jeff|Laptop> lmao @ HUR_DUR
<Arq> HURF DURF
<Arlight> It was great - we'd use his TP and read off the name - "TOWN PORTAL TO CLAW VIPER TEMPLE, HURRRR DURRRRR" |
#305145* (?/48) ⚐Flag
<@Mune> Hm... Just realised I'm going to have to revise pretty much SOLIDLY if I'm to get decent grades in the coming exams...
* @Mune sighs.
<tbw> best of luck
<@Mune> It's interesting because part of me is saying "Sod it. You can only do your best, no need to revise. Kick back, and enjoy the rain outside."
<@Mune> The other side is saying.
<@Mune> "GET TO WORK YOU LAZY BASTARD. STOP PROCRASTINATING."
* @Thorinair Quit (Quit: Thorinair)
<@Mune> Damnit Thor.
<@Mune> I didn't mean you. |
#305571* (?/44) ⚐Flag
kelthar: visual basic? the language where you can paste a novel into visual studio and it recognizes all the words as syntax? |
#303353* (?/44) ⚐Flag
<charl> I'm honestly not sure. I don't think I've had sex, but there's enough blackouts and memory loss and strange women I've spent nights talking with that I can't say 100%. |
#310355* (?/44) ⚐Flag
<+Cidsa> Elevator rape is wrong on so many levels.Comment: #wtfux
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#308116* (?/40) ⚐Flag
<Atnas> okay
<Atnas> why is there a french film from the 70s on my computer
<Atnas> "Jérôme, a 35-year-old diplomat, is struck by teenage girl Claire and harbours an unquenchable desire to touch her knee ..."
<Atnas> WHAT.
<Atnas> and why.
<Buck> man I loved that film
<Buck> it shaped my life
<Buck> I haven't been able to stop touching teenage girls' knees since
<Buck> 25 restraining orders and counting |
#306470* (?/40) ⚐Flag
(gunning4u): y'know folks
(gunning4u): I just love where I work sometimes
(gunning4u): like today, for instance
(gunning4u): it happens to be over 60's day where I work, so everybody over 60 gets 10% discount
(gunning4u): not a lot, I know, but they flock in by the thousands
(gunning4u): and you get one old chap
(gunning4u): on a zimmerframe
(gunning4u): who needs to go to the toilet
(gunning4u): only he can't quite make it
(mo): this doesn't end well.
(gunning4u): so he, quite accidentally, shits himself before he reaches the appropriate toilet
(gunning4u): which ends up all over the floor, down his legs, so on and so on
(lotus): ....ohdear
(gunning4u): having proceeded to crap himself, he then throws his underpants or whatever he was wearing into the bin in the toilets
(gunning4u): then goes out and CONTINUES HIS SHOPPING
(gunning4u): leaving little blobs of shit wherever he goes
(gunning4u): only where I work could this happen.
(lotus): that's a dedicated shopper |
#305617* (?/40) ⚐Flag
<whiskeyish> also, GOOD TIME OF DAY EVERYONE, i am going to end some neighbors.
<Surreal> what for whiskeyish
<whiskeyish> because i hate them.
<whiskeyish> i hate them so bad.
<Surreal> because they do what?
<whiskeyish> because they are fucking sucking up all the oxygen in my space and using it to scream obscenities in ebonics while listening to the same fucking tu-pac cd every day.
<whiskeyish> i am entirely sure that they only own one cd.
<whiskeyish> if they were less fucking ghetto and maybe even polite, i would loan them more tu-pac cds. |
#303399* (?/40) ⚐Flag
(VietnameseCentipede) 's Dominos Pizza was literally doing drug.
(VietnameseCentipede): They were shipping out their product as pizza deliveries
(VietnameseCentipede): Until one fateful night when they mixed up a regular pizza order with a box full of cocaine.
(VietnameseCentipede): Yeah, they got closed down reeeeal quick after that. |
#305346* (?/40) ⚐Flag
<@midgetspy> meh as long as it's faster than gigabit why does it matter?
<@midgetspy> unless you have multiple arrays in the same pc that you're copying between all the time...
<Slyboots> midgetspy: ...But.. faster is better
<Slyboots> Perhaps I have to paint the hard-drives red
<Slyboots> Cause.. Red ones go faster you know?
<KrisW> Only if it has sripes on it, too
<Slyboots> Oh! Cant forget the go-faster stripes
<Slyboots> .. And Speed holes
<pmow> yes, drill some holes for ventliation
<pmow> make sure the drives are off, though - to prevent damage
<+tolecnal> racing stripes, and a built in speaker playing the sound of a F1 car |
#311343* (?/21) ⚐Flag
@freq dude the clapper is funny as hell
@freq do they still make those
@MachinaeWolf clap on
@MachinaeWolf clap off
@freq you can put one on a tv
@MachinaeWolf freq: idk if they still make those
@freq and every time it gets loud it would go off
@MachinaeWolf I've never seen one in person either :/
@freq i had one on the living room lamp
@freq so when i'd come in the door i'd yell fuck and it would turn on for me
@freq i told my friend ricky about it and he was here knocking on my window to make it turn on and off
@MachinaeWolf lol!
@freq he was a bastard
@MachinaeWolf How'd that work out for you?
@freq it didnt
@MachinaeWolf XD |
#244617* (?/37) ⚐Flag
<hushicho> Wish me luck, I'm leaving to hang my art show soon!!
<Hawkye> Wouldn't it be best to grant it a fair trial first?Comment: #captain_n
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#300454* (?/36) ⚐Flag
<@Volte> some asshole sent a punch of porn to the school printer with my account once, and just as it sent the printer broke
<@Volte> and i was spared
<@Volte> it was like a miracle from god himself
<@Volte> like the printer just shut off and wouldnt come back on and they had to get a new printerComment: #cobol wutup
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#308034* (?/32) ⚐Flag
<Buck> a duck flew into my back door last night
<Buck> I think it broke a wing
<Buck> .lucky duck recipes |
#306107* (?/32) ⚐Flag
<Daeken> PovAddict: i'll put it up once it's fast
<PovAddict> ...that's what she said? I'm not really sure what interpretation to give it though
<Daeken> weak.
<Daeken> i expect better from you
<PovAddict> that's what she said!
<Daeken> :)
<cky> Hahahahaha.
* Daeken gives PovAddict a gold star for meeting his expectations |
#308293* (?/32) ⚐Flag
*** BrandeeNi joined
<BrandeeNi> Hello
<d4> o hai
<d4> welcome to #stress BrandeeNi, a channel of mutual sharing and respect and hugs
<BrandeeNi> Aw thanks
<d4> type !warez for a list of warez or !pr0n for a list of harcore fetish videos ^_^
*** BrandeeNi quit (Client Quit)
* d4 bows |
#309583* (?/24) ⚐Flag
crikes> this happened at work yesterday: a child's baseball cap was handed in, as it was found somewhere
<crikes> on seeing it, i yelled 'Hey everybody, look at this small hat! Look at how small it is! Clearly it was designed for some sort of tiny person!'
<crikes> someone then informed me that it was a child's hat
<crikes> 'Ah yes, I forget children exist!' I bellowed and they gave me a look like i was the weirdo and walked out |
#309105* (?/24) ⚐Flag
00:12 < fALSO_> Hi there, i was wondering something, how does someone spell irssi ?
00:13 < fALSO_> i mean, pronouce
00:14 < fALSO_> how does one : say it
00:14 < fALSO_> when talking to friend i say i use: i r s s i
00:18 < duck> imagine, if you will, a finn. Any finn will do, but a native finnish speaker will be preferred. Now imagine him scratch is arse, pull on his suspenders, spit on the floor, look straight at you and say; -irssi.
00:18 < duck> There you have it.Comment: #irssi
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#311331* (?/24) ⚐Flag
* kaeza has quit
* kaeza (~kaeza@unaffiliated/kaeza) has joined
<kaeza> hint: when testing keyboard handling, don't test Ctrl+Q |
#311647* (?/40) ⚐Flag
<Gustavo6046> It all began with the Big Boop.
<Gustavo6046> The Big Boop Theory.
* cheapie boops Gustavo6046 to see if anything exciting happens
* Gustavo6046 universes
<Gustavo6046> You can't hide from the facts. Furries are the source of life, the Universe, and everything. |
#304458* (?/59) ⚐Flag
<Xagor> I hate reading things about japan, and seeing points made by saying "there is no Japanese word for ~~" when I know that there is
<Xagor> like "There's no Japanese word for surrender"
<Xagor> or "There's no japanese word for self esteem"
<Xagor> a) koufuku
<Xagor> b) jishin
<Xagor> c) you suck
<YelseyKing> Uhh... C? =P
<Xagor> =P
<Xagor> well, Koufuku is Japanese for surrender
<Xagor> Jishin is Japanese for Self-esteem
<Xagor> and you suck is directed at people who DidNotDoTheResearch =P |